Show Me

Show me your ways, O Lord, teach me your paths; guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior,

and my hope is in you all day long."

Psalm 25:4 (NIV)

"I am so sorry sweetheart, but I just don't understand what you are saying; take Mommy's hand and show me." These are the words I often spoke to my daughter when she was just beginning to talk because I couldn't always understand what she was trying to say. I'm certain she could read in my face the complete lack of understanding of what she was trying so hard to convey. The expression on her face, a mixture of disappointment and hurt, made me desperate to figure out what she wanted to communicate. Finally, I grasped her little hand and asked her to 'show me'. Together, we toddled off to see what she was saying and that's where her expression met my comprehension and there was understanding.

Once she caught on, my little girl would often take my hand and she would say to me "show me", mimicking my words and with her face full of expectancy she would pull me toward whatever it was she wanted me see or do for her.

There are times in my life when I face circumstances, crossroads and challenges and I find that God's voice is not clear to me - I struggle with 'not getting' what Scripture is saying to me and I cannot discern God's answers to my prayers. Dreams and visions that I know are from God are beyond my comprehension. Being desperate to understand, I cry out to God; reach out to grasp His hand and ask Him to 'show me'. During these times, I also struggle with feelings of failure. I imagine the expression on God's face to be the same as my daughter's when I couldn't comprehend her words. I believe God to be disappointed and hurt that His message is not registering with me. As a mom, I felt guilty because I believed I should be able to understand my daughter, and as a Christian, I feel guilty because I believe that I should always be able to understand what God is saying to me.

It's during these times, I'm grateful for Scriptures I do understand, like 1 Corinthians 13:12 that continues to remind me that "we don't yet see things clearly. We're squinting in the fog, peering through a mist (Msg)." On this side of heaven, we will not have complete understanding. God is not disappointed in my lack of perception as long as I have heart that listens and is open to Him. I have his love and His love never fails. He will patiently persevere with me until I grasp His hand and ask Him to once again 'show me.'

Then amazingly enough, before long either through prayer, a sermon, or even circumstances there comes that 'aha' moment when my comprehension meets God's expression and there is understanding.